If you cry in your soup, it adds just the right amount of salt.

Stephen Ministry Leader Training

I was in Orlando January 11 - 17th at the Stephen Ministry Leader Training. I was 1 of 4 from the First Reformed Church in Sioux Falls. It was a very intensive training, but what was even more powerful for me was the presence of the Lord.  I never imagined what it was going to be like to share a week with close to 400 people from many different congregations and even a few from Europe. They all loved the Lord and wanted to provide leadership in their churches, training others to become spiritual care givers. One of the first activities we were asked to do, was to introduce yourself to someone you didn't know.  Not to tough when I only knew 3 others. I met Joe who was the only one from his church of 4000 to bring this ministry back to his church.  We were told that this person was to be our prayer partner for the rest of the week.  Joe received the Lord 5 years ago and has a wonderful enthusiasm for others to find the same joy and peace that he has. Now out of all those people, who would dare say it was just by chance that we would uncover a plan the Lord had prepared for us.  Right away I found out that he owned a business that rented canoes and gave tours in a huge State park close to Tampa. Joe found out that I have led many canoe camps in Minnesota and that I was going to be spending the next week on the beach at Treasure Island.  Guess what? Last Tuesday I drove up to Joe's "Canoeescape" and we spent several hours on a river through a swamp being amazed at God's creation and alligators, turtles, and beautiful birds.  I really like God's plans. I really enjoyed getting to know Joe's heart and to hear his prayers.

I was at the Falls again this morning and discovered that someone had built a sort of monument.

Jeremiah 31:21 says, "Set up road signs; put up guideposts. Take note of the highway, the road that you take."

Monuments like this remind me of our need to physically mark a spot that holds great meaning for us. Sometimes it is initials carved in a tree, maybe you have buried a time capsule next to a large rock, or maybe it is going back to the home where you were born.  These spots, these monuments remind us of a place where we have been on our journey of life. Jeremiah wanted the Israelites to put these along their way so they wouldn't continue wandering aimlessly.  So they are pivotal markers that remind us of where we have been and help us to keep going on our way.  I haven't been able to go back to my house in Dell Rapids, but it is one of those markers.  It has just been a year since I sold the house, had my auction, moved twice, travelled many miles, even to Jamaica, met many people, had powerful experiences, and have learned a whole new world called retirement.  But looking back to my house I am reminded that for everything that happened this year, the Lord has been the one making it happen.  Often I felt like I was going down this water fall with all its turbulence and then I get to the place where the water is almost calm. The Lord is amazing and he keeps me headed on my journey as I can look back and find that marker.

O Love That Will Not Let Me Go

1. O Love that will not let me go,
I rest my weary soul in thee;
I give thee back the life I owe,
That in thine ocean depths its flow
May richer, fuller be.

2. O light that followest all my way,
I yield my flickering torch to thee;
My heart restores its borrowed ray,
That in thy sunshine’s blaze its day
May brighter, fairer be.

3. O Joy that seekest me through pain,
I cannot close my heart to thee;
I trace the rainbow through the rain,
And feel the promise is not vain,
That morn shall tearless be.

4. O Cross that liftest up my head,
I dare not ask to fly from thee;
I lay in dust life’s glory dead,
And from the ground there blossoms red
Life that shall endless be.

©1997 Christopher Miner Music.

The Falls

I was out at the Falls this morning and remembered my camera!! I took some pictures and tried to capture just a little of the beauty of all the cascading waterfalls, some big and some small. When I got back the Argus had a front page article on the two people who lost their lives at the falls a few weeks ago saving a little boy who fell into the foaming icy waters.  I started thinking that maybe the falls weren't so beautiful, but then isn't there always some sort of danger in beauty?  Wow! You could take that thought in a lot of ways!  I was thinking of the beauty found in the life of another person. The danger is thinking that we will always be able to enjoy that beauty, tomorrow and the next day, and many days and years in the future. Yet, we don't know from one day to the next. My thought is to enjoy the beauty and the beautiful lives around us today, soak it all in, and let it give us a great sense of joy.

At Church last Sunday the Lord gave me a vision of my head resting on the "bosom" of Jesus.  It took me until yesterday to share it with my counselor.  It was such a powerful vision that I could no longer sing and had difficulty keeping my tears to a minimum so I wasn't causing a scene. It was saying to me, on a very intimite level that the Lord loved me and understood my sorrow and pain, that when he speaks to me it comes from his heart. 

So when I think of Maundy Thursday Lord's Supper celebration, it will never be the same.

As I am going through my second week of therapy here at Quiet Waters, I started thinking about the conversation beween the Velveteen Rabbit and Skin Horse. I am anxious to get home, but I am more anxious to be "Real".  Here is a the conversation:

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.

"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

"The Velveteen Rabbit, By Margery Williams , Illustrated by William Nicholson: HarperCollins Children's Books

My Lament

As a part of my therapy I was asked to write a lament like those you find in the Psalms, when David complained to the Lord about what was happening and then ended by saying that he would trust God through it all.  So here is my lament and my prayer is that the Lord would use it to give you courage and faith through it all:

My Lament

March 19, 2013

 

1.     O God, you created everything that is with just a word, a thought, a vision, and a plan.  You knitted me together in my mother’s womb and you know my name. Your desire in all that you created; even in the few years you have planned for me is that you would receive honor and glory.

2.    But God, how do you expect my life to bring glory to you when you continue to bring me so much pain.  I surrendered my life to serve you, to tell others about you, to help them to live Godly lives. Yet you keep trying to destroy me.  You send me people who want to blow up my home, people who complain that I am a lousy shepherd, people who betray my trust, friends who rally others against me, to send me away. Not just once but over and over again it continues to happen.  You break me in pieces and then break what is left of me in smaller pieces. How can this give you glory? Why are you doing this to me? I love you.

3.    Then you say, “My grace is sufficient”; you say, “I will not desert you or harm you”; you say, “I have plans for you and I am about to do something new, Can’t you see it?” You say, “When I am weak, then you can make me strong.” I depend on your promise that if I wait upon you, you will raise me up on eagle wings.

4.    God, as I lay before you as a small broken piece left now from what I was, fit me into the mosaic of your masterpiece. Let my small piece tell a powerful story about who you are. Let my small piece be a part of this beautiful plan for people to glorify you for your wisdom and design. Let it draw people closer to you in faith and love

5.    I love you and I trust you. I realize I will never fully have an answer to my whys. I also believe that because all things work together for good to those who love you that you will hear my lament and you will do something beautiful.

6.    My request is that, for now, you will surround me with a few good friends with whom I can share my tears and fears, my mistakes and weakness. A few good friends who will love me in flesh and blood the way you love me in spirit.

Quiet Waters

This is the Quiet Waters retreat center where I will be staying for 2 weeks. It is not exactly a cabin in the woods.  I have wonderful hosts, a hot tub and a bike. I had my first counseling session this morning. Hopefully my counselor will come back tomorrow :)

 

 I think I counted 6 fireplaces, 6 bedrooms, and lots of good food.

Just one of 4 lounges. There is just one other couple here besides our hosts, so I have this one all to myself!

I went for a walk through a riveen following a deer trail. I found a golf ball. I finally get to a gravel road and find these 6 deer resting on the lawn. Go figure.

I received this plaque on Thursday from the ministers of the East Central Cluster of Dakota Classis. What a neat surprise! It says, "You have served the Lord with gladness - tirelessly, faithfully, and with great compassion for His flock. Your investment in the lives of others has truly made a difference; You have given hope and encouragement to so many.  Now , as the day dawns on the next chapter in your life, may God continue to richly bless you and watch over you, may the God of peace grant you peace now and always." With great affection and gratitude from your pastor Network, March 2013
How Awesome!

Pictures from Jamaica

 

Part of our Jamaica Mission was to work with an orphanage in the mountains

 

This is Ashanta. The only time she looked at me and smiles was when I fed her a peanut butter sandwich only to find out later that she usually gets fed with a bottle.

 

We also worked on a Habitate House. We painted it pink on the outside and blue inside. Added windows and a roof!

 

This is Anna Marie on the left. It was her house we built

 

She was so happy to have her own home with her four children

 

Meet the basket man

 

We did stay in Montego Bay and had time to enjoy the sun and the beach

 

I think this trip could become a yearly tradition.  Let me know if you want to come along next January/February

Retirement

As of March 3, 2013 I am officially retired as a pastor of The Reformed Church in America. It is both difficult to write this but also very exciting.  I have been living in a cocoon for 42 years where I have had authority and respect because of being a minister.  Now I am leaving the safety and comfort of that position and ready to discover who I am and what I shall become.

Holy Week is coming again

Just to catch you up a little, I am now living in downtown Sioux Falls at 9th and Main.  I was planning my retirement for March 3rd and started looking for lofts in Sioux Falls.  This time I started during Christmas season and again the Lord provided a wonderful place for me.  I saw it listed on Craig's list which is quite rare for lofts, but I got the first showing and knew it was exactly what I was looking for.

March 3 will be my last Sunday at the Reformed Church in Dell Rapids. It has been a wonderful congregation to serve for 19 years and a great way to end 42 years of serving as a pastor.  I am planning to attend Quiet Waters the last 2 weeks of March where I hope to gain a new vision of where and what I will be doing for my "Third third" of my life.  Holy Week again will have a great influence on my future.

When I get my pictures from Jamaica I will try to add them to my blog.

Holy Week

I thought I should tell you about everything that has happened so far during Holy Week. On Monday I called to list my house for sale since I am planning my retirement for March 2013. The houses around me have been on the market for a year, so I thought I better get started. I signed the papers in the afternoon and at 6:30 they showed my house. An offer was made along with an earnest deposit. I made a counter offer and by 9:00 they accepted. On Tuesday I signed the papers and started searching for a place in Sioux Falls where I want to retire. Wednesday I came across a loft on Craig's List here in Dell's. I called about it and was able to view it at 1:30. I asked Aaron to come with me and we were very impressed. By 3:00 I called and I made my security Deposit on the loft. Today I met with the owner and signed the lease. Now I want you to know that each of these decision were made after my prayers and the prayers of my prayer group. Holy Week will now have a whole new depth of meaning.

Sarasota

Yesterday we took a trip down to Sarasota to see the John and Mable Ringling Museum of Art. To get there you have to take the Sunshine Bridge. It is a 4 mile bridge and is the most beautiful bridge I have ever crossed. I thought the clown museum was going to be just that, but we ended up staying there all day. They did have a history of clowns and a video on how to put on a clown face plus a store that had all kinds of supplies from hats to noses to shoes. Really it was a museum about the Ringling Brothers Circus. It was amazing to see all the outfits that the entertainers and the animals wore. They had everything from the truck the used to shoot the clowns out of a cannon to a large scale replica of the whole circus with tents and trains and all. Also what I didn't realize is that the Ringlings had a massive art collection from all over the world. These were all original paintings that came from the 1400's through modern art. Some were so large they covered a wall then there were the smaller ones like the "Blue Madonna". Incredible! Well, today is our last full day here and then we head home. I understand it thawed a little yesterday so I am encouraged!

What a beautiful day! My sister Joyce and I started out with a long walk on the beach looking for sea shells and sand dollars. We sat in the sun and went swimming until about 1:00. Then we went up the beach to John's Bay where there are all kinds of shops on the wharf. I found a white Shirt with a Bird of Paradise flower on it. What is interesting is that the last time Audrey and I were here I looked at a similar shirt in the same store, but I didn't want to spend the money. The shirt has new meaning for me now. It was 78* today!

alligator hunting

ok! We are back from our canoe trip to go alligator hunting. I still have all my appendages and I really did have a great time. The alligators were about 8 ft. but they seemed pretty content just sunning themselves today. The swamp water was low so there were times we had to get out of the canoe to portage to deeper spots. I have one picture of about a dozen vultures at a bend in the water path we were on. I was wondering who they were waiting for. we ended our outing by stopping to eat at The Crab Shack. I had a snow crab cluster and everyone enjoyed watching me digging the crab meat out. I had a very good time and my friend Gary and his wife Donna were wonderful hosts. I took my pictures on a disposable camera so when I get them developed I will try to get them loaded on this site.

Florida break

My family has encouraged me to continue adding to my blog site. This has already been an exciting month with our family all getting together at the Arrow Wood resort in Alexandria Minnesota. We were there from the Tuesday after Christmas until Thursday. It was a wonderful timeand hopefully we can do it again next year.

Now on Saturday my sister Joyce and I have flown into Tampa and we are going to spend the week at our time share on Treasure Island. I found out that a childhood friend of mine is a Pastor at a Presbyterian Church here in St Petersburg so this morning we surprised him and showed up at the morning worship. I haven't seen him for over 40 years, yet he recognized me the minute I walked in the door. We had a wonderful time together today and plan to go alligator hunting tomorrow in a canoe. I hope he has good memories of our relationship!

I'm back

I think this is Friday. Wouldn't you know it, as we were coming back from Vittoria on Wednesday night, I started to feel sick. About midnight, I had pretty well emptied my stomach, and by 4:00 AM I was in the car headed to the airport in Catania. I didn't dare eat or drink anything until our plane left Rome, because it only flies out every other day. Over the 10 hours it took to get to Chicago, I started to feel better and had a little to eat while we were waiting for our plane to Sioux Falls. I got into Sioux Falls at 8:45 which was a little over 24 hours since I started. Thank you for all your prayers! It is going to take a while for me to understand what a powerful experience this all has been. Aaron and his family greeted me at the airport with "Welcome home" signs and lots of hugs from the grand kids, which makes me realize that it wasn't just me that has been impacted by this experience. I hope this can be an encouragement for you to let the Lord stretch you into doing something new. I'll try to add some last pictures. One is of the German volunteers, Arianna from the Scicli Church, Jovanella who is the administrator of the nursing home, and David.

Tuesday

Ok, I can't be using a calendar from 2010. I leave on the 10th, but that is on Thursday. We had a great time in Palermo, saw several cathedrals, several different markets,and some interesting country, since Palermo is on the north edge of Sicly. Monday night we went to the harbor and had fresh fish at a small diner (6) tables. They would bring out one kind of fish and then they would bring out another round of something different. I think we did 6 rounds,ending with shrimp and a fish that looked like a trout. I got black ink from the baby squid on my lips and David thought that was pretty funny! The country has such a variety,with old ruins and then next to that might be a really nice villa. There are still some German "Pill Boxes" along the road. It all helps in understanding what these people have gone through.